Farfarello: The Rain Man
by Neko-Ice-Queen
Summary: Y'know, when it rains, it is said that God is crying." Nagi starts a little trouble...
1. Nagi's been a bad boy

Title: Farfarello: The Rain Man

Author: Neko-Ice-Queen

Rating: PG...K+...whatever...

Category: Humor/Pure, unadulterated CRAP!

Pairings: Mild Crawford/Schuldich

Warnings: OOC-ishness

Disclaimer: Weiss Kreuz isn't mine. Wish it was, though...Takehito-sama is such a genius...

* * *

Another day for the Schwarz crew. Takatori had no use for them as of yet; there was nothing (and no one) to do. Crawford, clad in his signature cream-colored suit, was reading an imported Wall Street Journal. Schuldich was reading an imported Playboy. Nagi was sitting in an overstuffed armchair, sulking as always, and Farfarello was sitting in a corner, gnawing on a lamp's electric cord, grinning gleefully when he got a shock.

Everything was quiet, and then it started to rain. Cold, wet rivulets of cold, wet water fell from darkened clouds and ran down the windows to join their fellow raindrops on the cold, wet ground.(1)

Schuldich threw down his magazine. "Man! I have a hot date tonight!"

Crawford didn't look up from his Wall Street. "You can still go out. Just grab a coat."

Schu-Schu gaped at him like he had just announced that he liked the Ice Capades. "I can't go out in that:" He gestured to the rainy window. "The rain will mess up my hair! I can't let it get all wey and frizzy." He struck a Right Said Fred-esque pose.(2) "I have to look good for the ladies."

"Hn." Crawford rolled his eyes and refused to look at his now pouting teammate. Schu-Schu could be such a girl sometimes.

"Now I'm gonna have to cancel." He left the room, moping. Crawford went back to his reading.

Silence reigned once again. That is, until Nagi got bored. Nagi had been advised, ordered, whatever, not to mess with Farfarello. It's sort of like a zoo, but instead of a "Don't Feed the Lions" sign, it says, " Don't Feed the Farf." Nagi knew this, but being the curious little tyke he is, he didn't care.

Nagi sauntered over to the psychopath and draped an arm around his pale, scarred shoulders. "Farfarello, the Farf man, Lord Farfenheimer, the Farfometer, Farfareeno, Farf-"

"What, laddie?" Farfie interrupted, his voice slightly muffled by the electric cord between his teeth. "What do you want, Nagi?" He smiled when he got another shock.

Nagi could hardly speak around the Equator-sized grin on his face. "Y'know, when it rains, it is said that God is crying."

Farfie could hardly speak around the Equator-sized grin on HIS face...that and the electric cord. "Is that so, laddie?"

Nagi nodded. "Yep! Y'know, it should rain all the time. Don't you agree?" His grin grew greater when Farfie nodded.

Farfie let the cord go and stood up. "Excuse me, Nagi." He bowed and went up to his cell. He acted almost normal.

* * *

(1)- As you can see, "cold" and "wet" are my favorite words.

(2)- Right Said Fred did the song, "I'm Too Sexy"

Tsukaremashita; owari

Neko-Ice-Queen


	2. Farfie needs a spanking

Fwoomp boom crunch crash...

Fwoomp boom crunch crash...

Fwoomp boom crunch crash...

Fwoomp-

"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT RACKET!" An angry Crawford bellowed.

Fwoomp boom crunch crash...

Never wake Crawford up in the middle of the night. Seriously Perturbed! Crawford will turn into Seriously Ready to Kick Some Serious Ass! Crawford.

Fwoomp boom crunch crash...

"What is it, Braddy-boo?" Very Sexy! Schuldich asked, sitting up and rubbing his liebe's shoulders. (1)

Now, if I may make an accurate portait of Bunny-Brad's expression at this moment, I have a fleeting suspicion it might look like this: -.- . "Don't call me that."

Fwoomp boom crunch crash...

"What was that?" the German asked, blinking sleepily.

The "portrait" is still very accurate. "It's coming from Farfarello's cell." He rose from the bed and, after covering his most delicious nakedness, stalked to said madman's cell.

* * *

A gleeful, schoolgirl giggle. The only sound that could be heard above the noise as Farfie toiled over the mass of metal and wire and...um...building...stuff. A loud, joyous laugh that just wouldn't sound right coming from a normal man. But then again, Farfies and Cream isn't a normal man...

"Almost finished!" The giggle continued. "Just a little more, and God will cry oceans of blood tears!" Giggle, giggle, giggle.

Braddy-babe frowned from his position at the door. His frown deepened when Farfie went back to work with vim and vigor.

Fwoomp boom crunch crash...

Fwoomp boom crunch crash...

Fwoomp boom crunch crash...

Fwoomp- ...silence...

Quiet. Sweet, merciful, quiet. 'Maybe he's asleep,' Crawfish thought to himself. 'Either that or he finally killed himself.' He shrugged his shoulders. 'Whatever. As long as I can get some sleep.' He walked back to his room to get some sleep, but first, if a certain redhead (no, not Aya) played his cards right, he could be "up" for another round, if you know what I mean...

* * *

(1) - Liebe (pronouced LEEB) means love in German.

Kutabacchi maeyo; owari

Neko-Ice-Queen


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